Pressure

These three girls - man do I love them!  I never would have thought the Lord would have given me a house full of girls!!!  I'm just not the girliest person and I've never considered myself the greatest homemaker.  

I've shared with a few friends the pressure I feel as a mom to three girls.  I'm the example to them of what a godly woman is.  How I treat my husband, their father…how I care for my home…nourish my family…control my emotions (let's face it, girls struggle a lot more in this area). 

Many times I feel like I'm failing them.

Will they become nurturing to their families? Emotionally and spiritually?

Will they have the skills to prepare meals for themselves and their (hopefully future) families?

 Will they be educated to face our very confusing and ever-changing world?

Will they know how to effectively and efficiently run a household?

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Will they even desire to have families and children of their own?  Will they see children as blessings?

Will they feel brave enough to try new things and approach situations that seem bigger than them because their God is bigger than anything?

Will they be able to develop relationships with others - sincere and loving relationships that will encourage their souls?  

I know a lot of lessons will also come from their daddy.  But because they are girls and will eventually be women, a lot of what they are learning for their future is going to come directly from me.  And I can tell them all day and night what they should do.  But for me to actually live it out in front of them; well, that's just a bit harder. And it takes a bit more work.  

So I feel a lot of pressure not just because I am an example to my kids but because I'm an example to my kids who will grow up to be women.  And I desire so much for them!

I know I will fail.  I already have.  And where I fail the Lord's grace prevails!  But I still can't help but feel that extra pressure as a mom to three girls.  

Recently, the book we are reading in my Bible study encouraged my heart in this area (it's called Ezer - good read and highly recommended!).  I'm realizing that I struggle with this fear and desire to control.  

****CLICK ON PICTURE TO ENLARGE****

I love to strive.  My pride desires to "look good".  I desire perfection from myself as well as from my children.  But this is unrealistic on this side of heaven.

This is SO me - I don't want to ever mess up.  And while desiring to do what is right is a good thing, God has shown me that the root behind it is usually my pride and not my desire to please and honor Him.  

Through this, the Lord is showing me that my "hard work" is strangling me.  It's putting this pressure on me that's not necessary.  I do have a responsibility to my girls.  I am to present to them the best I know how the way to live as a godly woman of God.  But I cannot beat myself up every time I mess up.  I can't let my pride be the reason I'm striving to do right.  Because if my heart's desire is to be pleasing to the Lord, I shouldn't feel pressure to be perfect.  Because I will mess up.  And I can show my girls Christ even in those failures.  

My prayer is that I will be able to seek God continually as I parent my girls.  I would love nothing more than to see them come to know Him as their Savior - and to be well-rounded citizens, of course. 

And now, on a lighter note…

I just love this picture.  :)